We Got Beef?

Chapter Six

As the sun rose, many citizens of Hill Hollering Knob stood packed side by side in the towns underground emergency shelter watching dirt shaking loose from the wooden timbers above their heads, while listening to the soothing voice of the weather forecaster coming over the radio; “Today’s temperature is wonderfully set at 70 degrees and a bright day with no rain in site. Truly is a beautiful day to take the family fishing and swimming in the bordering Tuolumne River”.

The radio was interrupted with; “stay toned for a special report”. The entire assembly stood silently listening as the report blurted out over the radio; “Mr Mud Wallering Jr reporting! I am high above Hill Hollering
Knob in my chopper mobile watching history in the making. It appears the town has found their 50 thousand head of rustled beef and yes they have finally Got Beef! Yes the whole world is watching live through my camera as 50 thousand head of cattle trample down the entire town, every vehicle and building is flattened except the court house that contains the underground emergency shelter. The heart of the whole world goes out as calls are coming in expressing desires to help in their hour of need. Donations are already coming in to help rebuild their town. Also this just came in; the National Guard refused to get involved as they said they have absolutely no cattle herding experience, and the Armed Forces refuse to bomb the beef while the whole world is watching.” End of report.

The Judge and Mayor were whispering back and forth with each other. The Mayor said; “We better come up with and get started on a really good campaign speech and fast or we may not get reelected”. The Judge said; “I don’t think promising to supply beef steaks at next years Bar B Q the Beef Festival is a good idea”.

The whole crowd froze stiff and became silent as they were interrupted with a very loud “Mooooooooooooooo”. The Mayor looked over the crowd of people wearing cow costumes and boxing gloves and said; “ok who’s the wise guy? If you come forward now we will not press charges, we will only have you evaluated by the towns’ psychiatrist’.

The tallest person in the shelter began making their way pushing through the crowd heading toward the Mayor. The lighting was rather dim but once the person stood face to face with the Mayor, the Mayor swallowed his gum. As the person ran pushing their way through the crowd heading for the shelter door, the Judge looked down at the Mayor and noticed he had a boxing glove stuck in his mouth. The shelter door opened and closed.

The radio once again blared out; “stay tuned for a special report” “This is Mr Mud Wallering Jr reporting again; the Phantom cow was spotted coming out of the court house and she let out a horrible bellow that I could hear all the way up here in my chopper mobile and the court house of Hill Hollering Knob just collapsed under a mad dash of 100 thousand hoofs”

By: Mr Mud Wallering Jr © to be continued